12:45 PM
Kinsz
Some of the most difficult things for me to understand being a mommy is the way involved my girls are in video games. As a child I wasn't very big on video games, I was far more interested by reading and playing outside. Sure, I had a video gaming system as a kid, but it did not entice me as it does to my girls.
Like many other parents nowadays, I fought endlessly with my girls about video games. My girls were obsessed with them; they always aspired to find the coolest games console as well as the newest games, although Barbie video games were their most favorite. I can remember when my youngest received Barbie: The Island Princess for the DS for her birthday 1 year. As soon as she opened that Barbie video game, no other presents mattered. With her new Barbie game on hand, off she went to her room where she remained for what seemed hours.
I found myself literally in awe over this strange hold that video games appeared to have over the children. I had read all of the warnings in parents' magazines that speak about how bad video games were for children. I had even seen numerous reports on the news talking about exactly the same things and how several studies were done. With all this not so great news about video games, I was determined to stop them within my house. I grounded my girls from video games for days at any given time, sent them outside to spend time playing in the sun. I signed them up for dance lessons, took them over to the park, quite simply, I exhausted myself looking to distract them from the video games they seemed to love very much.
As you can imagine this battle against computer games within my house was exhausting. It looked like no matter what I did I really could not change my girls' minds over online games. I'm not really the type of parent who gives in to her children or am I the type to surrender when I want something. However, it seemed like this battle against computer games was going to defeat me. So, instead of attempting to fight their obvious desire for Barbie video games along with the pleasure these games gave them, I made the decision to evaluate them.
I grabbed my daughters DS and her Barbie Groom and Glam Pups game, the newest favorite Barbie video game, and started playing it. I probably got about a few minutes in to the video game and was at a total loss about what to do. No real surprise that video games still baffled me being an adult. Instead of just toss the game down in disgust I called my daughter to the room to assist me. The surprise on her face when she saw me playing her video game was priceless.
My daughter sat down with me and patiently explained to me things I was supposed to do. Before I knew it I was having a lot fun, sitting there giggling and laughing with my daughter, and I was even finding pleasure in a video game. My daughter and I probably sat there for a couple of hours, before I remembered that it was way past time to put together dinner on the table. I immediately jumped up to go cook dinner, but seeing the look on my own daughters face made me stop short.
Rather than rushing out directly into kitchen, I sat down to talk with my daughter. My daughter was confused. She wasn't able to understand why I'd stop playing video games with her to go cook dinner because we have been having a good time. Oh how nice it truly is to be young! In place of just leaving her puzzled, I told her that yes I'm having fun, however I needed to address my responsibilities as well, basically if I decided not to prepare dinner, nobody would eat. Also, I reassured her that after dinner we were able to sit down and play a few more video games.
The simple truth is if you take the time to recognize my kids' pleasure in video games, I was able to see things I had never witnessed before. Video games may very well be fun, far more fun than reading a book. However, I still was on a pursuit to curb exactly how much the children played video games. Now I understood why they liked them. I found myself even enjoying them. All the same, that did not mean I supported my kids playing them nonstop, I knew that boundaries should be set.
In talking with my husband, who probably enjoyed online games a whole lot more than the kids did, we thought we would set up a family game night, only we chosen to do it two nights each week. Two times a week after dinner my daughters would go pick their favorite Barbie video game, which surely each one had her favorite. My youngest daughter loved the Barbie: Island Princess video game, while my older daughter preferred Barbie Groom and Glam Pups. We all took turns selecting the games for family night. And, in the process, every person benefited from spending some more time together as a family.
Something I learned, as a parent out of this experience is the fact that trying to ban something usually isn't worth the battle, I favor to save my battles for the really big things. By taking some time to listen to the children and open up my mind, I realized that all the studies were just that a couple of studies, only I understand the kids, and only I can decide if video games are hurting my kids. Now I have come to realize that video games are amazing, they can even be experienced together. Therefore, although we never fight over whether or not video games must be played. We all do have issues with moderating how much time is allocated to video games. Now I won't lose that battle. Pretty much everything needs moderation!
Like many other parents nowadays, I fought endlessly with my girls about video games. My girls were obsessed with them; they always aspired to find the coolest games console as well as the newest games, although Barbie video games were their most favorite. I can remember when my youngest received Barbie: The Island Princess for the DS for her birthday 1 year. As soon as she opened that Barbie video game, no other presents mattered. With her new Barbie game on hand, off she went to her room where she remained for what seemed hours.
I found myself literally in awe over this strange hold that video games appeared to have over the children. I had read all of the warnings in parents' magazines that speak about how bad video games were for children. I had even seen numerous reports on the news talking about exactly the same things and how several studies were done. With all this not so great news about video games, I was determined to stop them within my house. I grounded my girls from video games for days at any given time, sent them outside to spend time playing in the sun. I signed them up for dance lessons, took them over to the park, quite simply, I exhausted myself looking to distract them from the video games they seemed to love very much.
As you can imagine this battle against computer games within my house was exhausting. It looked like no matter what I did I really could not change my girls' minds over online games. I'm not really the type of parent who gives in to her children or am I the type to surrender when I want something. However, it seemed like this battle against computer games was going to defeat me. So, instead of attempting to fight their obvious desire for Barbie video games along with the pleasure these games gave them, I made the decision to evaluate them.
I grabbed my daughters DS and her Barbie Groom and Glam Pups game, the newest favorite Barbie video game, and started playing it. I probably got about a few minutes in to the video game and was at a total loss about what to do. No real surprise that video games still baffled me being an adult. Instead of just toss the game down in disgust I called my daughter to the room to assist me. The surprise on her face when she saw me playing her video game was priceless.
My daughter sat down with me and patiently explained to me things I was supposed to do. Before I knew it I was having a lot fun, sitting there giggling and laughing with my daughter, and I was even finding pleasure in a video game. My daughter and I probably sat there for a couple of hours, before I remembered that it was way past time to put together dinner on the table. I immediately jumped up to go cook dinner, but seeing the look on my own daughters face made me stop short.
Rather than rushing out directly into kitchen, I sat down to talk with my daughter. My daughter was confused. She wasn't able to understand why I'd stop playing video games with her to go cook dinner because we have been having a good time. Oh how nice it truly is to be young! In place of just leaving her puzzled, I told her that yes I'm having fun, however I needed to address my responsibilities as well, basically if I decided not to prepare dinner, nobody would eat. Also, I reassured her that after dinner we were able to sit down and play a few more video games.
The simple truth is if you take the time to recognize my kids' pleasure in video games, I was able to see things I had never witnessed before. Video games may very well be fun, far more fun than reading a book. However, I still was on a pursuit to curb exactly how much the children played video games. Now I understood why they liked them. I found myself even enjoying them. All the same, that did not mean I supported my kids playing them nonstop, I knew that boundaries should be set.
In talking with my husband, who probably enjoyed online games a whole lot more than the kids did, we thought we would set up a family game night, only we chosen to do it two nights each week. Two times a week after dinner my daughters would go pick their favorite Barbie video game, which surely each one had her favorite. My youngest daughter loved the Barbie: Island Princess video game, while my older daughter preferred Barbie Groom and Glam Pups. We all took turns selecting the games for family night. And, in the process, every person benefited from spending some more time together as a family.
Something I learned, as a parent out of this experience is the fact that trying to ban something usually isn't worth the battle, I favor to save my battles for the really big things. By taking some time to listen to the children and open up my mind, I realized that all the studies were just that a couple of studies, only I understand the kids, and only I can decide if video games are hurting my kids. Now I have come to realize that video games are amazing, they can even be experienced together. Therefore, although we never fight over whether or not video games must be played. We all do have issues with moderating how much time is allocated to video games. Now I won't lose that battle. Pretty much everything needs moderation!
About the Author:
Laura has worked with children, development and education, for over 10 years. In depth barbie video games reviews and recommendations can be found on her website.
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